What do you expect from your friends? That may sound like a silly or strange question. I would expect most would answer this question with expectations of respect, love, mutual interest, humor, and a willingness to make you a priority when applicable. In return most people would say they would expect themselves to do the same.
Recently, I learned about some friends who moved without letting us know. Now, my wife and I were not besties with these people, but we were close enough to have shared some personal things and include them as a part of our inner circle.
I know I wasn’t “owed” a goodbye or to be informed these folks were moving far away, resulting in us not likely seeing them in person again, but I felt it was a courtesy they could have extended. I can’t say I’m mad at this couple, but I am disappointed. After all, how hard is it to write a simple one-sentence text to say goodbye? I mean if someone is going to be called a friend, is that really too much to ask? To compound the issue, I didn’t even know they moved until a couple months had passed. Again, is it unfair to ask for some way of letting me and my wife know?
The point of this story isn’t to throw shade on these people or for me to feel sorry for myself, but instead to reflect on how should we expect friends to behave? From my anecdotal perspective, it would seem that more often than not, folks are self-absorbed and aloof to their friends. Sadly, we are all guilty of this to some degree. It makes me reflect on myself and I have to analyze whether I’m the sort of friend I would want to have.
Part of being human means to come short in all areas. We can be good in many areas, but perfection is unattainable for our species. Therefore, none of us are beyond improvement. With that said, there is understanding we aren’t perfect, and being downright rude. Simply up and leaving is an example of the later. Again, this isn’t to disparage these people, but instead a call for all of us to do better. We all need to spend more time thinking outside of ourselves and our little worlds and think about other’s and how they feel.
What do you think? Have you shared similar observations that people tend to be self-absorbed? Let me know your thoughts!